Hard On! 6th Birthday - Club Review

HARD ON! 6TH BIRTHDAY - SATURDAY 26TH SEPTEMBER
REVIEW FOR SEENQUEEN


You know the saying!?, "You wait for a bus for over ten minutes and then three come all at once!", well that can be said of this weekend in a way, as we have waited nearly ten months for a good old clubbing birthday knees up and then what happens, two mega parties present themselves at exactly the same time and as much as we love a good old birthday celebration, it was sadly inevitable that with two great options, we had to make a difficult choice. But then life is always about making choices, which then presents itself with difficult decisions, so what was our dilemma? Well, would we go with the usual flow and pay homage to gAylisting legendary espaniol club giant's London sister at super new club Cable, reaching its third birthday, or would we step into our sleazy shoes and celebrate in true saucy style, the sixth birthday of the most well known fetish clubs on the gay scene? Yes, the choice was definitely a tough one, so what did we decide?

Well, with Matinee ruling our lives in more ways than one and Hard On! hardly getting a look in, we decided to head down to Hidden in Vauxhall, getting down and dirty for Suzi Kruger's uber sexy club's birthday bash, with the promise of some really raunchy shows, sordid sounds from Hard On's! resident D.J.'s and a truly up for it crowd in the most diverse choice of dress of any club outing we have been to. So, donning our leather chaps, boots & black braces (and a top of course, we are not that brave!), we made liaison with our friend Benoit for pre-club drinks at Barcode Vauxhall, before making the short trip across to Hard On's! entrance at just before midnight, being, as with previous visits, handled swiftly & efficiently by the friendly security staff, then taking our place in the sizeable queue out on the terrace, waiting to get into the club proper. Looking down the row of people, it was definitely not a Matinee crowd here, more an incredible mix of fetish enthusiasts, leather & rubber garbed hunks & chunks, larger than life extroverts and down to earth regulars that love the chance to escape normality, that being the magic about Hard On! as a club night and setting it apart from many others, something which we love.

So, we were in, or were we? as a technical hitch with the guestlist sidelined us and a couple others, requiring the attention of Suzie Kruger herself, in a way making us feel privileged, but with the words "oh no not again" running through our thoughts, it wasn't long before we were beckoned across by Suzie who then waved us through the entrance and catching up with us demanded a thank you for the guestlist entry, which ofcourse we were most grateful for. Technical hitches over, we checked our belongings into the coatcheck and were in the thick of it all in a trice, meandering through the Cruise bar that have a definite cruisy feel to it, an eclectic mix of people socialising & warming into the action as D.J. Halo-Is was pumping out some hard edged tunes, befitting the Hard On! style and evoking memories of Fist days of old. Bumping into familiar faces at the bar including old work pal Cliniot & the two Elliot's, we caught back up with Benoit, grabbing some refreshments and then heading round & up the back stairs (not the back passage naughty!!) then winding down into the main, Red room, where Hi-fi Sean was in command of the decks, delivering a hard & horny filled string of sounds to a packed space, including daringly dressed dancers on the podiums.

Unlike our last visit on our birthday back in December, for this, Hard On's! birthday, we were so much more relaxed & in tune with the crowd and with our spirits already high, being helped along by liquid refreshments as well as other goodies, we fell into our stride with ease, bopping away in our leather chaps and, thankfully comfortable boots, like many, stripping off our t-shirt, just leaving our saucy braces on top to play with. There was a real sense that the crowd were up for some well & truly raunchy & ravenous action and weren't to be disappointed, as the podiums were cleared of the impromptu dancers and the first of two extrovert exhibitions commenced, courtesy of Dark Alleys Media's very own Matt Fistenberg (is that his real surname?!?!), who flew in from Germany especially for this mega celebration, performing an erotic show with the well hung star Davide, which certainly got our attention. Now, it has to be said, that in our regular club visits our minds are well & truly focussed on the music, admittedly always keeping an eye out for the shows, but here at Hard On! we were simply transfixed as both Matt & Davide got down & dirty, looking as though they were enjoying the experience as much as we were.

With the show over and our erogenous zones buzzing with excitement, we had to take a wander around the club, although not before saying our hello's to Brent Nicholls, who had arrived to take up the D.J'ing reigns from Hi-Fi Sean, both of whom had made a superb effort in dressing in leather clad style for Hard On's special day. So, wandering back round and through the Cruise bar, still packed with fetish fancies chatting & mingling, we made a brave move into the play area (usually a no go thing for us at Hard On!) and it was immediately clear that many had also taken this opportunity to fulfil a little bit of erotic fantasy & audacious action and when we were pushed against the wall in virtual darkness, we let down our guard (and our chaps!) and succumbed to a little pleasure, braces dangling by our side, but will let your imaginations wander as to exactly what the pleasures were (are we beyond the watershed?!?). Being the shy and retiring person we are (who are we kidding?!), it wasn't long before we were, some would say prematurely, back in the Red Room with our minds focussed back on the music, lapping up the luscious & tantalising tunes that Brent Nicholls was serving up, much tougher than we are used to from this most versatile (in music terms) D.J. talent.

Now, with all the action we had savoured so far, as if our erotic desires were not at a height of deliriourism, it was about to gain yet more, climaxing with a truly jaw-droopingly overt second performance by Mr Fistenburg and his stage partner, the man's surname truly evoking the outrageously raunchy act unfolding in front of our eyes made even more brilliant by Brent who pitched the music to match Matt's movements, sending us into sensory heaven, truly transfixed by the top to bottom bravado before our eyes and one of the most sexual public performances we had seen in a long time. With the show over, we slid back into music mode and danced away to Brent's chunky choices well into the early hours, having completely lost our friend Benoit, who was up to no good naughtiness for sure (and why not?!), but eventually deciding it was time to (literally) hang up our boots, changing back into our regular clubbing gear for further escapades elsewhere, well into Sunday morning.

So what did we think of this Hard On! birthday bash? Did up live up to expectations? And did it succeed in re-kindling our interest in our fetish side? Well, not being regulars to Hard On!, we perhaps are not the best to ask as to whether the turnout was more than the average event, but it certainly had a great vibe, buzz & excitement about it. Having been used to the "old" format, we thought that with Hi-Fi Sean & Brent in the main room worked really well, but being the socialite that we are, there is something special about the feel in the Cruise bar, but with the music there more akin to Fist days, a little too heavy for us. The raunchy shows in the Red Room along with the accompanying tunes played out, were real highlights and popping into the playroom was an extra bonus. Not visiting often, we were not sure of our expectations, but having had such a good time, we walked away from Hidden with a smile as wide as a Cheshire cat's (did the cat get the cream?!) and we really enjoyed the whole experience of dressing in our chaps, our boots, our braces & all.

Choosing between Hard On! & Matinee was always going to be a controversial one, and with news fast reaching our ears that The Evolved Events team had really pulled out all the stops, not least with some mesmerising stage shows from Mark M Forns Fierce crew as well as great D.J. performances from Alessandro, Fat Tony and especially Paul Heron, not to mention as special appearance by Jean Phillpe, playing out his latest collaborative smash with Oliver M, we may well have missed out, matters being made worse by so many people remarking on our absence. But without the aid of the Disco Matt helicopter, we can't be in two places in one night and therefore give each the justice they deserve, so we don't regret the choice we made and Hard On! certainly deserved our reviewing attention. We have to thank a whole host of people for making our trip to Hidden a great one, in part, down memory lane, but moreover serving up a unique & an altogether alternative experience. An extra special thanks to Suzi, Hi-Fi Sean, Brent, & The Dark Alley boys for a big contribution to our night and we are sure it will not be long before we dip into our fetish side once again.(DISCO MATT)